Married to a Brownsville Bully 3 Page 3

  “This pussy gonna be mine forever, you heard?” he told me with each thrust into my pussy. I felt like I had died and was watching myself from above. Judging from the way he was beating on this pussy, he had be sexually frustrated too.

  “It’s already yours, babe. It’s yours.” I kissed him on the neck as he continued to hand me that dick all over the bedroom.

  After three hours and a bunch of positions, what was supposed to be a quickie before dinner turned into a sex marathon that neither of us was ready to finish. Laying in front of the fireplace, wrapped in the throw blanket from the chaise, I was in heaven.

  “I love you, Golden,” he murmured as he put his arm around me and continued to sleep. We had both fell asleep, but now I was wide awake. This man beat the walls off my pussy and then rebuilt them at the same time.

  “Love you too, babe.” I kissed him on the lips and covered his naked body with the blanket when I got up. Wrapping my silk robe around my body, I went downstairs to grab him some leftover food.

  Like I knew she would, Pit Pat had wrapped us both a plate up and left it on the counter. I quickly heated the food and returned to the bedroom. Yoshon was still asleep when I placed the food on the nightstand. Walking over to the floor, I nudged him.

  “Yo, I need to fuck the shit out of you again,” he grabbed me by the waist and pulled him into his arms. Taking my hand, he put it on his dick and stared at me. “This shit hard for you, come take care of it.”

  That’s all he needed to say. I removed the blanket from his body and lowered my mouth. I took all of him into my mouth and sucked him like a jawbreaker. I didn’t stop until his toes were curled and he had empty his kids right in my mouth. I swallowed them, wiped my mouth and stood up.

  “Ma, I was moving you so I could nut,” he told me as he laid on the floor trying to recuperate.

  “I know.”

  “Oh shit. You nasty, girl,” he laughed.

  “Come eat so we can shower and end the night on a good note.” I winked and went into the bathroom.

  If he thought my words weren’t enough, I was about to show him how much this body craved him.

  3

  Alicia

  “I’m sorry, Ms. Costa. Your baby didn’t make it.” I heard the doctor’s voice and tried to ignore it. He didn’t just tell me I lost our baby. I couldn’t believe that Grand was the reason behind us losing our child.

  Tonight was supposed to be a night on the town for the both of us. He had been out of town for a few weeks and I missed him. Tonight was supposed to be about us moving into the future and making everything work with each other. I didn’t want to hear about his soon to be ex-wife or his baby mother making him angry. I wanted tonight to be all about me. Was I wrong for that? I sacrificed so much being with Grand, and all I wanted was for the attention to be on me for once. We never spoke about my pregnancy, how I felt or anything pertaining to me. It was always about him and the women in his life. Dinner, movies and a bubble bath where I showed him just how long I could hold my breath underwater while sucking his dick. That was on the agenda tonight and it’s all I wanted to do. Apparently, Grand had other plans, and that involved me getting dressed up to go to the club where his friend’s birthday bash was.

  The club was the last place I wanted to be. Still, because I loved this man, I pulled clothes on and went to sit in the club with him while he acted like the man. It wouldn’t have been so bad if he didn’t get drunk and forget I was there. When it was time to leave, he stumbled ahead of me out of the club. His friend kept telling him to hold onto me, and he ignored him. Shots broke out and everyone ran every which way. I was trampled while everyone tried to get to safety. Grand was nowhere to be found. I had heard that he drove off with his friends. Here I was on the floor being stepped, kicked and trampled on and the man, whose child I was carrying, was in the car pulling away from the club.

  “We’re going to have to perform a D&C to make sure we get everything out. I’m putting you on the schedule for tomorrow morning, which is in three hours,” The doctor stared at his watch briefly and touched my shoulder. “I’m sorry, again,” he told me.

  “Want me to call, homie?” Jean aske . Tears dripped down my cheeks as the news hit me again.

  Denim’s brother, Jean, happened to be in the club that night celebrating a new client he had landed. He called my name, and I couldn’t make out who it was, as I tried to pick myself up off the floor. When I spotted blood on the floor, I lost my shit and started panicking. He was there to whisk me off to the hospital and make sure I was fine. It was something the father of my child should have been doing. Instead, he was too busy doing his own thing to notice that I hadn’t come through the doors of our condo yet. Who was I kidding? He was probably too drunk to notice that I was gone.

  “For what? He’s drunk,” I sobbed.

  Pulling his chair closer to me, he touched my hand and rubbed it a few times before he spoke. “I’m so sorry, Alicia. I wish I could take the pain away from you.”

  “Why would you want to take the pain away from me? Jean, you took my virginity years ago, and we’ve lost touch a million times over.”

  “That’s where your ass always go wrong. Just because we had something in the past doesn’t mean I stopped caring about you, Alicia. You just lost your baby and you’re sitting up in this hospital alone. That shit got to hurt.”

  When Jean took my virginity, I thought we would be together forever. I was straight up and down without any breast, thighs or ass. Everyone that knew me always said I was shaped like a ruler. Not Jean; he always found me to be attractive and took his time with me. I gave him my virginity and thought we would be together forever. Jean was older and went away to college. I tried to visit, but I was a sophomore, where the hell was I going? He had college girls to look at and fuck, why would he want some chick shaped like a damn wooden stick? When he called, I ignored him. During that school year, the curves that God had blessed Hazel with the year before, decided to show up on my body. Boys took notice and I went from the chick shaped like a ruler to fine ass Alicia overnight. When he came home from school, I didn’t have time for him. I had a boyfriend and avoided him like the plague.

  As we got older, we joked around about me being a fresh ass and not wanting to be his girl. He moved back home after college and we did our own thing. He got into the streets heavily because he came home from college and realized his mother needed help. Whenever I was single, I contemplating on getting a piece of him, but before I could, another man always stepped into my life. Grand happened to be that man this time.

  “Why did I go out tonight? All I wanted was a quiet dinner and to talk about the baby,” I sobbed and put my hands over my face. I was embarrassed. How could I not be? I lost my child because I was up in a club I had no business being in.

  “Stop blaming yourself, Alicia. How did you know something like this would go down? You wouldn’t have put yourself in that situation if you had known.”

  “This baby is everything I wanted. This baby was going to make everything in my fucked up life better. My relationship isn’t the best and this baby was going to help that.”

  “Damn, Lee.” Jean was the only person who called me that. I had almost forgot he had called me that. It had been years since I had heard that name. “A baby don’t change no nigga. If he wasn’t shit before you got pregnant, he got even more of a reason now.”

  “This was going to be different,” I promised myself more than him. “Grand was going to be there for his child with me,” I sobbed hard. The same women who had wronged him were the same women who had his children. All I had was one job and that was to have this baby and I couldn’t even get that right. My aunt was going to be so disappointed in me.

  “It ain’t my business, and I’m not going to get involved. All I’m going to say is that you’re smarter than this. He got you sitting in this hospital room and hasn’t come by or called your phone. There were niggas shooting in there and he hasn’t called or checked on you
at all.”

  The words and actions all made sense, but I wasn’t ready to focus in on the picture yet. What Jean was saying to me made sense and I should have been infuriated by Grand’s action. My phone was on a full battery and he hadn’t tried to reach me once.

  “I got my girlfriend waiting in the waiting area. Let me take her home and then I’ll come back up here.”

  “Don’t worry about it, Jean. Go home and finish enjoying the rest of your weekend,” I told him.

  “Nah, I’ll drop her off to her crib and then come back.”

  “I just want to be alone. Thank you for everything,” I sniffled and accepted the kiss he placed on my cheek.

  When he left, I broke out in a silent cry. My tears were for my kid that I lost and, in this moment, I wanted to die right along with it. This was something I had wanted for so long and I had finally received it. So to have it taken because of something that could have been avoided hurt me so bad. All I wanted was to have a nice night out with my man. If I had known this was going to happen, I would have stayed home with the house phone. Staying home pregnant and worried about where my man was, was way better than waiting in the hospital for them to scrape the rest of your baby out of your uterus.

  The knocking on the door stopped me from my private crying session. “Hi, Ms. Costa, I didn’t want to disturb you, but we got your blood results back. How long have you been HIV positive?”

  Turning my face, I faced the window and let a tear come out of my cheek. It was best that Grand wasn’t here because if he knew I had HIV, he would have beat my ass all through this entire hospital. This baby was important for that reason and that reason alone. I needed someone to love me just because of me. I didn’t need them to see me as the woman that had a disease that would soon kill her.

  “For two years,” I mumbled.

  “Does your partner know?”

  “Yes,” I lied. He didn’t know. If he knew, I wouldn’t be laid up in this bed right now. I would probably be in a grave.

  “Has he been getting checked regularly? Since you were pregnant, that means you both were not using protection.”

  “Yes, doctor. He’s been getting checked regularly and he doesn’t have the shit!” I raised my voice.

  “I’m sorry. I just needed to ask all the right questions. The nurse will come in a few to check your vitals. Again, I’m sorry.” He headed out the room to leave me alone to my thoughts.

  When I sat in my doctor’s office and found out that I had gotten HIV from my ex-boyfriend, I cried. I cried and begged him to cure me, like he could. Why me? Why wasn’t I careful? Then, I thought it was God telling me it was time to head home to be with my parents. My doctor got me on the right medicines and I had been good ever since. I took a ton of medicine every day and I would for the rest of my life. Grand thought it was a bunch of vitamins and called me crazy for taking that many pills. Little did he know, this was what was keeping me alive. This baby meant that world to me and I needed to have this baby. It wasn’t about the security that Grand provided me. Grand thought he had me fooled about his past relationships. I knew he was someone that tossed people away when he was done with them. At least when he was done with me, I would have a baby that loved and needed me. Closing my eyes, I tried to get some sleep before my surgery time. Sleep wouldn’t come easy, and I knew that for sure.

  4

  Big Ben

  My sister banging and scraping pots woke me up before the sun beaming through the window did. Being locked up for years, I was used to being up before the sun rose. I promised myself when I got out that I would continue to get up early. After getting comfortable in my sister’s queen size bed in the guest bedroom, I lied to myself. Sleeping in past noon was some shit that I could get used to. This morning was nearly impossible to try and sleep. My sister was cooking breakfast for my son and being loud as fuck about the shit too. Pulling the covers off my body, I stretched and then went to take care of my morning hygrine. Sharing a small ass cell, toilet and sink with another man was something I had become accustomed to. My sister’s huge bathroom was one I could live with for the rest of my life. Yolani had come through with the apartment she bought for her. It was out of the hood, and that was something I needed for my son and sister. It helped me sleep easier knowing they were well taken care of while I was locked up.

  When I got knocked, I was saving for a house out of the city. Something where me, Yolani, my sister and son could live. Soon as Yolani signed her rights away, I knew that ship had sailed. She didn’t want to be a mother and let me know her entire pregnancy. Yolani would have gotten an abortion if she wasn’t so far along when she found out. The only reason she kept that baby is because I begged for her to keep Yairo. When I got knocked, I knew there wasn’t a chance in hell that she was going to step up and be there for him as a mother. It was my sister who rolled her sleeves up and stepped in for Yairo the way that she needed to. She put herself through nursing school while raising a new baby. All I could do is try to have people drop money off to her. Yolani lived up to her word and made sure that she got money dropped off to her. When my sister had got robbed on her way to school, I had Grape put the word out to Yolani and to move her out the hood. My sister was now a registered nurse and my son was an honor roll student who loved all things sports. It felt nice to come home to family and feel welcomed.

  Yairo didn’t know that I was his father. It wasn’t a conversation I was ready to have with him. He didn’t need anything that complicated the life my sister had set up for him. He had friends, school, and his sports and that’s what needed his focus right now. Staring at him got me weak to my knees because he favored his mother so much. The expressions he made reminded me of Yolani. I hadn’t seen her in years and it wasn’t because I didn’t want to see her. Yolani never visited me, she just made sure my books were stacked, and my family never wanted for anything. Grateful was an understatement. Still, it made me wonder why I couldn’t lay eyes on the woman I loved?

  “About time you woke up, sleepy head,” my sister giggled and handed me a mug of coffee. Taking a seat at the counter, I took a sip of the piping hot coffee.

  “I wasn’t trying to wake up. Your ass in here slamming pots and pans, you still don’t know to cook?”

  “Oh please. I was trying to make your big head self some breakfast before I had to get to work. I’m working all day and I might take an extra shift.”

  “Why you working so damn hard? The hell you trying to buy?”

  “Nothing, I just like to earn my money. All the money Yolani drops by here helps with things, but majority of it is in Yairo’s college fund.”

  “When’s the last time she dropped some cash by here?”

  “Last month. She’s supposed to be coming this week. She either sends Grape or comes by when Yairo is in school. Ben, she acts like she didn’t have that boy. Totally disconnected if you ask me.”

  “Mama, can I go over to Tory’s house after school?” Yairo came into the kitchen with his book bag, basketball and hat sitting to the back. I went to prison and this boy had grown up overnight.

  “Is his mother picking him up from school? You know how I feel about you taking the train with him. You’re too young.”

  “I’ll be eleven years old next week,” he plopped down in the seat next to me. “Tell her, Uncle Ben.”

  “I’ll come scoop y’all up and drop you off at his house. How that sound?”

  “Better,” he mumbled. “I’m still not a baby.” He had a expression that he shared with his mother. It was the face she made when she was pissed about not getting her way. It wasn’t an expression she wore too much because Yolani always got her way.

  Nuzzling his cheek, my sister bent down and kissed him. “You’ll always be my baby. Now, go and get yourself downstairs. Tory’s mom is waiting to carpool you guys to school,” she told him.

  “Later,” he called as he grabbed his bags, kissed his mother and left out the door.

  “Anyway, it’s like she doesn’
t want to get to know that boy at all,” she continued with the conversation.

  I wasn’t surprised that she was being that way because she never wanted Yairo to begin with. “Gina, you saw how quick she signed those rights over to you. She didn’t want to be a mother and we both knew what it was.”

  “Still, I thought she would be around like an aunt or something. You haven’t been around because you’ve been locked up, but you and Yairo have a bond,” she sighed. “Anyway, she’s supposed to stop by this week. I never know if it will be her or Grape that comes.”

  “I need to get up with Grape. Time to get back to the money, I been sitting still for ten years.”

  Sitting behind the wall with nothing but time on my hands drove a nigga crazy. I got a few degrees while I was in there and shit, still that didn’t fill the hole of wanting to be on the outside with my family. Money could have been made on the inside and I was tempted to start selling while I did my bid. The thought of being caught and getting more time helped me make the wise decision. Instead, I counted down the days and worked with my lawyer to appeal the judge’s decision.

  “Don’t do anything that will have you back in prison, Benjamin. We can’t take you going away again,” she warned me.

  “I’m gonna move smarter this time. I got more to lose.” I winked and dug into the plate of food she placed in front of me. “Anyway, where’s this new boyfriend? You got him around my son?”

  “My son,” she corrected me. “You need to stop slipping up and talking like that. He’s not here, but you’ve done it when he was here. He’s my son, Ben. I sacrificed to raise him and make him who he is today. You and Yolani laid down and created this human that neither of you were there to take care of.”

  “You right. My nephew.”