Married to a Brownsville Bully 2 Page 7

  This was the thing with being with a grown ass man. Yoshon wasn’t like Grand; he wasn’t young and stupid, he was grown. He proved how grown he was over and over again. Where he could have lied to me, he didn’t. Even if he knew it would hurt me, he was honest with me. How could I not appreciate that coming from a man?

  “I do want this. I’m just…scared.” I sighed and held my head down.

  A part of me was terrified to start to love this man. He was the real deal and I didn’t want to fuck up things with him. Not to mention, he wasn’t here for my young ass behavior. As much as I was mature, I had the moments when I did act like my age. Yoshon wasn’t with the kiddy games and being with him meant that I had to step my game up as well.

  “Scared of what, baby? I’d tell you the truth before I ever hurt you. I’m transparent, what you see is what you’ll get.”

  “Okay, Jellyfish,” I giggled to lighten the mood.

  “On the real, I want to be with you. I want to help you raise Gyan and be happy. If that’s not what you want, let me know now so I can get over my feelings for you.”

  “I want us.” I smiled and kissed him on the lips.

  “Since you wanna be shopping in Gucci and shit, and only bring me back a belt… I’m taking you to dinner and some shopping,” he told me.

  “We have dinner already. You don’t need to take me shopping; I’m happy with the bag.”

  “Nah, since you wanted to be on Rodeo Drive, I’m about to really show you Rodeo Drive,” He smirked and gripped my ass.

  “If you insist. I’m excited to have my baby here with me. I want to take him to Disney land while we’re here.”

  “We can do that.”

  “I don’t expect you to come with us. I know you have stuff that needs to be done and we don’t wan—”

  “Golden, shut up. I want to go and have fun with y’all. Stop fronting on me, ight.”

  “Yeah, whatever,” I smiled.

  The sun was setting, and we were looking at the beautiful view while being cuddled on the patio. It felt right sitting here with him. “You sleeping in my bed tonight?”

  “Nope,” I smirked.

  “Yeah, ight. Your thick ass will be right in my bed. You want this dick.” He held his dick print and my mouth watered. He was right. I wanted that dick more than I wanted this food from Mr. Chows.

  Before he was able to get my ass to his room with my legs up, I asked him a question I should have been asked. “How was the appointment?”

  “You sure you want to know?”

  “I wouldn’t be asking unless I was, babe.”

  “It was good. Lil’ mama is growing and is at seven pounds already. She’s coming so it’s about making Em comfortable, but she’s been doing yoga, eating right and all that white people shit. I really appreciate her for taking pride in this pregnancy like it was her own child she was carrying.”

  “How do you feel. This is the home stretch now.” I knew he felt nervous and was probably panicking more than what he was showing. It was fine for him to be nervous. He was about to be a father to a little girl that would spend her entire life looking up to her father. He would be her entire world, especially since she didn’t have a mother there to look up to.

  “I’m nervous about talking to Pit Pat. I know she gonna be in her feelings about me keeping it a secret.”

  Touching his shoulder, I offered him a smile. “Your grandmother loves and supports anything that any of her grandchildren does. She’ll understand your reason for keeping mute on the situation. She’ll also step in and raise her great-grandchild as well.” I rubbed his head and he looked to be lost in his thoughts. “And, I’ll also be there for you too.”

  He looked up and paused his thoughts for a second. “Golden, I don’t want you to feel like I’m forcing to be a part of something you’re not ready for. I had a minute to think and it was selfish of me to trick you into coming to the appointment. It was some childish shit and it will never happen again.”

  “Yes, it was childish. What was fucked up was me not wanting to be a part. You’re a part of my son’s life every day and never complain. In fact, you’re happy to be a part of his life which means that much more to me.” I smiled and held his face.

  This was different and I was, of course, scared. Still, what if he was scared to lend a hand and help me and my son that night? Where would we be now? I knew he would need help, and he couldn’t do this without a support system. Yoshon was a good person and it didn’t take me long to figure that out. He deserved to have the same support he had been giving me since he met me in the middle of the blizzard.

  7

  Hazel

  My mother called my cell phone for the sixth time since she had got up this morning. I hadn’t had morning sickness at all, and then it came out of nowhere. The thing that confused me was that it happened at night or early evening. Some nights I couldn’t make it out of bed and had to use the trash can beside my bed. I loved my parents more than life and appreciated them welcoming me home with open arms, except they had a boatload of questions I wasn’t ready to answer yet. How was I going to explain everything to them and I was still confused about a bunch of stuff? Here I was a successful business owner knocked up, living in my parent’s house and dealing with a fake wife who had a drug problem? Why did this happen to me? I was a good person, paid my taxes and brushed my teeth three times a day. So, why was all of this happening to me at one time?

  “I know you saw my call come through on your phone,” my mother finally successfully picked the lock to my bedroom door. “Get some clothes and fix yourself up. Alicia is downstairs in the living room with her boyfriend,” she told me like I gave a shit about my cousin.

  Alicia always had some new damn boyfriend that she wanted to parade around here like we gave a shit. My parents always entertained her and hosted dinners, which is another reason I rarely came home. Alicia’s parents died when we were sixteen years old. They died in a car accident trying to make it home from a conference they attended out of town. She moved in with us and then moved out when she was eighteen with some boyfriend at the time. My parents were the closest thing she had to parents, and I didn’t mind sharing them. The one thing I hated about my parents was that they didn’t approve of me being gay but supported Alicia anytime she had a new boyfriend. It was known that Alicia got around with niggas that only had money. She was always with some nigga that had money and was flaunting him around. Mind you, she was unemployed and lived with whoever she was with at the time.

  “I’m not hungry and I’m not in the mood to deal with her new boyfriend for the week.” My mother rolled her eyes and held on to the door.

  “I wasn’t asking. Since you been here, all do you is lay up in this room all day throwing up. You don’t come and spend no time with me or your father. You pregnant, ain't you?” she suspected right away.

  “Ma, just because I don’t want to sit and play nice at dinner doesn’t mean I’m pregnant.”

  “I’m no fool, Hazel. You’re barely eating, and when you do eat, you’re vomiting. You spend most of the days sleeping all damn day and never going to your shop. I know when a woman is knocked up,” she accused. “You better not be so stupid to get pregnant with that woman,” she spat as she left the room.

  “Whatever,” I rolled my eyes and tried to turn over, and she pulled the blanket off my body. “Ma, give me the blanket.”

  “Go ahead and put some clothes on. I’m not about to play with you, and if you don’t get up and come down, you can find somewhere else to live. Oh, and we’ll be having a discussion. Your father might be blind and think you came home because life got too hard, but I’m no fool.” She waved her hand at me and left my room.

  Sitting up, I rolled my eyes and looked at my ringing cell phone. It was Denim calling again and I ignored it – again. He had been calling me all the damn time and I continued to ignore his calls. I needed to sort things out before we sat down and had a conversation. Denim thought that he could whisk hi
mself into town and I would automatically leave Yolani and my life like it didn’t matter. I had a lot to think about before leaving her and moving on with him. That was even if I wanted to leave Yolani. She needed me. How could I leave her and not get her help? I owed this to Pit Pat more than I owed it to Yolani’s ass. Picking myself up, I switched into a maxi dress and some white cotton socks and headed down the hall to wash my face and comb my hair. They were lucky that I was blessing them with my appearance, so they was about to get this comfortable ass attire I had on.

  “Auntie, you know I was craving your ribs. Right, babe, I was talking about them,” Alicia’s annoying voice sounded as I came down the stairs.

  She was with some bearded brown skin dude who was holding her hand. “Nice of you to join us, Hazel,” my mother sarcastically remarked.

  “Hey,” I said to Alicia dryly.

  “Hey cousin. I came by the shop so you could hook me up, but you weren’t there. Can you hook me up tonight?” she asked. Alicia always came to the salon and never paid. She thought because we were family that she could come in without scheduling an appointment and not pay full price. The type of nails she got cost over a hundred dollars, and she would toss fifty dollars like it would cover her service.

  “No. I have a shop where you can pay full price for your nails.”

  “Haze, money isn’t an issue,” she giggled, clearly embarrassed in front of her friend.

  “Oh yeah? Explains why you gave me less money last time I did your nails,” I chuckled and went over to the new man in her life. “How are you? I’m Hazel.”

  “Grand,” he shook my hand back.

  “Your father is running late so we’ll start dinner early. Come into the dining room. I spent all morning cooking,” my mother smiled.

  We all made our way to the dining area and I sat Indian style in the chair. My mother brought out our plates and sat them down. My mother always had this thing for entertaining. Well, except when me and Yolani visited. Yolani hated to visit my parents and I never blamed her. My parents didn’t like her; they tolerated her. When we came over, my mother didn’t bother to cook and was always in bed. It was my father she left to cover up with some bullshit excuse.

  “So, how long have you two been dating?” my mother questioned and started to eat her food. My father was the one who always said grace, so I knew she wouldn’t do it unless he was home.

  “We’ve been dating for three months. I went to Virginia with a few girls for a concert and ran right into him. Of course, he had a girlfriend at the time, but she wasn’t worth nothing because look where he is now.”

  “I hear that, Alicia. You know how we Brown women are,” my mother referred to herself by her maiden name for a quick moment.

  “Yes, Auntie… Anyway, we have been tight ever since. He didn’t want to come to New York, and I had to keep traveling to Virginia to see him. He finally made the move to come up here and stay with me.”

  “Stop with all that,” he squeezed her shoulder gently. “I had something to wrap up before I could make it up this way. I was outgrowing Virginia anyway.”

  “Wait, you moved here for her?” I just had to know the answer to my question. It looked like for once Alicia found her a keeper.

  “Yes. Especially since we’re expecting!” she squealed in excitement.

  My mother dropped her fork and I got excited because for once Alicia was about to hear my mother’s roar. “Omg! Are you serious, Alicia? I’m about to be a great aunt!” she clapped her hands excitedly.

  “Wait What?” I blurted, confused by her act of excitement. “How the hell are you excited? You know this will last a few seconds and then she’ll be on your door pregnant with no job. Yet, you scoffed at me when you accused me of being pregnant upstairs?”

  “Hazel, this isn’t the time.” She cut her eyes at me angrily. She was pissed that I was putting her on the spot.

  “Well, I’m pregnant too,” I announced since everyone had an announcement in this bitch. I had one and I wanted my mother to know about it too.

  “How stupid could you be? That damn woman runs around and does what she wants, and you’re carrying a child by her?” my mother shouted, forgetting that we had company.

  “You forget she doesn’t have a dick? I’m surprised you did because you don’t waste time to call out that she’s a woman,” I replied calmly and took a spoonful of potatoes into my mouth.

  “Hazel, how stupid could you have been?” she pushed herself away from the table. “A baby? Do you know what that means?”

  “Yeah, it means the same thing that it does for Alicia, I’m having a baby. What the fuck makes me so different? I have my own business, money in my account and I’m able to take care of myself and a child.”

  “Yet, you laid around this damn house like a damn bum. Not going to work and laying around here like a damn piece of the furniture.” She had the nerve to say to me.

  I haven’t been myself the past few days, and I had been laying around while feeling sorry for myself. Even with me laying around, I was still making money while laying around. With all this happening, the first place I thought to come was home. I complained about my parents, but I didn’t want to be in a hotel, I wanted to be home. She damn near dropped her silverware to be excited for Alicia, but when I mention that I’m pregnant, she’s upset and calling me out of my name. The shit was fucked up and I was used to it. My mother always babied Alicia. I guess it was because she lost her parents young and she felt she needed to make her feel included in our small family. I didn’t mind having my cousin live with us and share my parents; it was how my parents acted that caused me not to fuck with my cousin. She saw the shit and never said shit, instead, she soaked up all the attention like the big-headed whore she was.

  “Okay guys let’s not do this in front of Grand. Congratulations, cousin. I hope we have girls,” she smiled. From her face, I could tell that Alicia was excited for me.

  “Thank you. I’d rather a boy.”

  “I’d rather you not have any damn child,” my mother mumbled as she started to eat her food again.

  Pushing my plate back, I stood up and left the dining room. It was a part of the reason that I didn’t come and spend time with her ass. Mo always told me that I was rude and mean to my mother, but she didn’t see the shit she did. Every decision I’ve ever made in my life was never good enough for her. I went to nail school, made money doing nails out the basement and then opened a successful shop. None of those things were good enough for her. She felt I should have been going to college to be a lawyer or something with substance. So, instead of trying to make her proud of my career choice, I chose to make her proud of my personal life, and she didn’t support or agree with that. No matter what, I tried to make my mother proud, and it was never enough for her. It wasn’t enough that I was a successful business owner who had the money to take care of myself. I didn’t need Yolani; I wanted to be with her. My parents didn’t see that. It was more my mother than my father. He checked on me and tried to understand my relationship with Yolani. The sad part was that I wanted to make my mother proud. I wanted to hear her say how proud she was of me, and I would never hear that out of her mouth.

  I closed and locked the room door back and climbed back into the bed. Staying here for too much longer wasn’t going to be an option. The last thing I wanted to do was to rent a apartment, and I didn’t want to go back to the home I shared with Yolani. The only option I could think of was staying in a hotel. My mother made me feel like I wasn’t wanted home. Here I was knocked up, lonely and being made out to be the fuck up of the family. I knew one thing, I needed to get out of this house because my mother was going to drive me up the damn wall.

  There was a knock at the door, and I looked at the door and tried to act as if I didn’t hear it. The person knocked once more, and this time I heard Alicia’s voice. “I know you hear me, Hazel,” she spoke through the door.

  Rolling my eyes, I unlocked and opened my bedroom door. “What?”
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  Alicia pushed her way into the room and I closed the door back. “I’m sorry about, Auntie. I didn’t know you were pregnant. If I would have known, I wouldn’t have said anything,” she apologized. As much as I couldn’t stand my cousin, this wasn’t her fault. She didn’t make my mother say all those things, and she damn sure didn’t make my mother act the way she acted toward me.

  “It’s fine. I’m used to what comes out my mother’s mouth by now.”

  “It’s not okay. I don’t really say anything because last time I did, she cursed me out and told me that it wasn’t my business what happened between you and her,” she revealed to me. All this time I thought my cousin didn’t speak up because she didn’t care. Finding out she had been on the receiving end of my mother’s lethal tongue surprised me. My mother was the sweetest woman in the world, but she had the nastiest tongue and attitude when it was something she didn’t like.

  “Alicia, my mother has been doing this my entire life. Since I started making my own decisions, she hasn’t been happy. I’m not surprised now, just disappointed.”

  “You and Yolani went to the sperm bank to make this happen?” she questioned. I knew that was a question my mother wanted to know as well.

  “No, it’s Denim’s baby.”

  “Denim?” she gasped. “First of all, when did he come back into town and how did that happen? Is he like your sperm donor or something?”

  “No, we’ve been fucking around, and that’s how this happened,” I pointed at my stomach. I didn’t have a stomach yet, but I knew in the short amount of time that I would be showing. My stomach was flat, so I knew I would be looking bloated soon, but would actually be pregnant.